You know the old saying, “see a penny, pick it up, all day long you’ll have good luck. Invite a Vegan, feed her bread, your marriage will last until you’re dead.” by @eat_drink_and_be_mary (or in this case, nibble_drink_and_be_mary) who says: “How to spot the #vegan at the wedding. LOL #help”
Dear Vegans, if this meal doesn’t look appealing to you, may I suggest you never do anything that could land you in the slammer (and no, I’m not using “slammer” as a metaphor for marriage).
One day, I know it’s coming, someone is going to send us a wedding photo of an onion sandwich. It will happen!
Watermealon #5 “The Wedding Mealon” in our watermealon series from our watermealon period by @__jessica__annn__ who says: “The only thing for me to eat at this wedding reception is watermelon🍉 #vegetarianproblems”
I hope you did like my mother-in-law does and brought your checkbook without filling in the amount until you saw what the food is like.
All these watermealons have left me wondering: What are vegans fed in winter?! Stay tuned to find out!
TGINI! (Thank God It’s Not Iceberg) by @glennapril who says: “Being a vegan wedding photographer is a bit of an adjustment. #whyveganspreeat At least there’s salad.”
Glenn supplements his work as a wedding photographer by shooting lettuce porn.
Is there something wrong with me that I feel a kinship with that tomato?
“Okay, onion slice, take two steps to the left. Perfect. Now carrot shred, turn to the side and point your tip toward me.”
This meal improved @ohheorgiepeach‘s vision so she could more clearly see how dismal it was. “#vegan at a wedding… #awkward #rabbitfood”
We found this photo on Reddit. We Reddit and weeped.
Maybe you shouldn’t have checked “carrots” on the RSVP card?
Follow the sound of vegans crying to the Buffet Of Tears, brought to you, once again, by Marriage.
From @ltiaraad: “My vegan meal at this wedding… #noveganoptions#veganproblems#wedding#vegan#nothing”
While they were stopping at Costco for water they couldn’t get you some hummus?
I bet you had a vegan meal but it looked so good the staff ate it.
Did you try to eat that shadow?
From @toroktoberfest: “This wedding has plenty for me to eat.#wedding#buffet#veganproblems#vegan#myfavoritefoods“
Where do we get our protein? Why, chickpeas and onions, of course!
Sure it may be skimpy, but the plating is beautiful.
This would go well with a nice glass of water.
This sad yet resourceful entry comes from The Sexy Vegan, who writes: “Pop quiz: How do you find the vegan at the wedding? #vegan#alwaysbringbackup”
Personally, I never brought my own backup to a wedding. Probably because I enjoy complaining too much.
I wonder if people bring backup brides and grooms to weddings. Are cold feet vegan?
Follow @thesexyvegan on Instagram, and buy his cookbooks too!
This was my sad sad meal at an otherwise lovely wedding at the NY Botanical Gardens with a “famous caterer.”
Lucky for me, my salty tears added some flavor and sauce.
Unlucky for me, the pasta was so overcooked it was mealy.
It’s ok though, they really spiced it up with that one Orecchiette!